This is blasphemy

I wants to know why my site isn't in DMOZ. Waiting.......why, why, why?
I installed it on DMOZ like 6 years ago, so what gives? What are you peoples doing? Why aren't you doing your JOB?
I know I did everything right. I even submit my site to a different category every month for last 6 years. This way I know I had to have gotten category right by now! Let's see.....6 years X 12 months(or categories) = 113 categories, so I must have got it right by nows? I mean you only gots like 200 categories, ya?

So is someone going to email me update, or what? Should I pm all moderators?

Also too, I had my little sister check my grammars on my DMOZ submissions...so I know it was all perfect. I just don't get it. Can someone tell me where the phone number is to call and check on my site? Preferably an 800, please.

Should I leave my phone number here in forum, and then someone will call me and let me know? Also, should I keep submitting every month? And should I do different pages? Or keep submitting my privacy policy page?

Oh, and also too...my site is of the highest professional quality. After 6 years I have earned a PR-1 rating from Google...and I am getting 100,000 visitors a month...if that does qualify me then what does, huh?

I have total 100% unique content, too. Every piece of content that we scrape...gets rewritten by our top notch software program...so totally unique!

And how come like 98% of DMOZ sites are porn, but my site which has no porn...doesn't get submitted? In fact, I was on DMOZ the other day...and I was looking in a computer category...and every listing was a porn site, what gives? ..........oh wait.....sorry, nevermind, that was a different directory...my bad.

I have a site that is dedicated to people that want to be "toe models", and yes there are many people very interested in this material. This is a legitimate career, and I feel like I am being discriminated against. I use to be a toe model

I guess I am just going to have to call DMOZ headquarters and get some answers.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok, sorry guys/gals...but I just couldn't resist.

I came to this forum hoping to garner some info on how I might be able to nudge my suggestion along (which I very carefully submitted over 5 months ago), but after spending quite a while reading through the threads...I realized that all I can do is wait.

I also came to the conclusion that the moderators here...have more patience than I do, and at least I feel like I could get some help down the line, should my site get added...and I were to have a problem.

So, thanks guys/gals, and you'll have to excuse my sense of humor...I'm a bit of an acquired taste. I just figured you guys/gals could use a laugh...after reading the same old questions over and over.

Thanks,

Doug

You are SO banned.

hutcheson said:

You are SO banned.

Click to expand...

I know...now I'm never getting into DMOZ. And, when the big G. gets wind...they will certainly pull all of my #1 rankings. For the love of God! What was I thinking.

The traditional next step is to write to the President, Federal Trade Commission, the Supreme Court, the United Nations Tribunal for the Rights of Mankind, and/or the Galactic Patrol, insisting that dmoz be suppressed to protect surfers from its monopolistic tyranny.

To the best of our knowledge, this has never had an effect, although if dmoz had been banned from Boskonian space, it's not clear that we'd notice.

(Which reminds me, the E. E. Smith category needs a bit of work.)

I guess I am just going to have to call DMOZ headquarters and get some answers.

Click to expand...

Thanks! That's the laugh I needed today.

I mean you only gots like 200 categories, ya?

Click to expand...

Ya. I'll figure 590000 is somewhat like 200. It certainly has some flavour of a number to it.

This is so funny, I really think the editors should find out what this guys site is and and list it; even star it. He deserves it after making us laugh.

birdie said:

This is so funny, I really think the editors should find out what this guys site is and and list it; even star it. He deserves it after making us laugh.

Click to expand...

Why thank you Birdie...that was sweet of you. Actually my site is in my profile if you were curious. Even though we have worked very hard to produce an authority site in our niche (which I believe we have accomplished), I would never ask for any special treatment. That said, I commend you for your brilliance and keen observations.

Actually, although I often laugh at my own rants...Hutcheson's "you are SO banned" made me laugh more than anything that I wrote.

Thank you,

Doug

dougd said:

I know...now I'm never getting into DMOZ. And, when the big G. gets wind...they will certainly pull all of my #1 rankings. For the love of God! What was I thinking.

Click to expand...

With all those #1 rankings with the Big G, why are you concerned about a listing with DMOZ?

The Old Sarge said:

With all those #1 rankings with the Big G, why are you concerned about a listing with DMOZ?

Click to expand...

Sarge,

Well, it's not that I really think a DMOZ listing will have any significant effect on my rankings, at this juncture.
It's just that I'm kind of neurotic, and we've worked so hard to create the most comprehensive and high quality site in our niche, that I just won't be able to sleep well until I have the gold seal of approval from DMOZ.

I'm optimistic though - As my daddy always told me..."Son, even some days the sun shines on a dog's ass"

Son...

Click to expand...

OMG, you've revealed the secret location of our hindquarters, er, headquarters...