Barbi:
I believe that you have received about all the clarification what we are willing to provide.
It's not you, and it's not personal.
Spammers read these forums like a religious tome. The more information we give to you, the more information we give to people who want to aggressively exploit that knowledge to manipulate the directory for their own purposes.
I haven't looked at your site, nor have I looked a the editor notes that surround your site, but what I hear the other editors telling you is that this is a fairly clear-cut proposition. Your site is ineligible for a listing, and it is not a matter of a little tweak. ((despite for forum guidelines to the contrary, if the reason for rejection is something that can easily be fixed, we usually try and leave some pretty broad hints)).
As for Dr. H. He really is a nice guy, but an acquired taste. Don't personalize and read his replies with the thought that, if nothing else, you are probably getting a heck of a free vocabulary lesson.